They only care if you do it for free!


They only feel sorry for those who do it for free! But how about those who chose to do it regardless of how hard it is? When I first started my job as a carer for a patient with dementia I began writing this blog and I would feel embarrassed about the comments and messaged […]

Wanted: ‘No tears’ toothpaste


Out of the most humiliating things you can tell a grown woman she should or needs to do, to brush her teeth has to be at the top of the list. It clearly implies two things: 1. Your breath stinks; you have got no sense of hygiene: i.e. you are dirty. 2. You should be […]

The wrinkly young lady


Incidents of Dorothy seeming to be stuck in the past were not rare. And when I say ‘past’ I don’t mean last week – I mean several years, decades ago. Come on, her seat in the living room seemed to be strategically placed to check out the men walking past the house, and the way […]

The Kind Sister


My struggles getting Dorothy to get in the bath and get changed, put on her make-up and look presentable for the day were just beginning. Although after the ‘tights’ incident’ she seemed to almost instantly forget what had happened, that still didn’t take anything away from the despair of the moment. I would have to […]

The 50ish lady with tights on


So after so much pondering there was no question about it. I signed on to becoming a dementia carer for at least a year. Now the question wasn’t of whether I would stay on the job, but it was of how I would survive it. Me and Dorothy just kept clashing! How I would get […]

An independent woman


If I was to stay at this job for at least another year several conditions had to be met: I would need to keep earning good money (as all things aside) my ultimate goal was to go back to University and maybe travel back to my home country for a while as I was terribly […]

That INSOLENT girl!


I had just about decided that it was time to go downstairs and face the wrath of the little lady. I had not been in the job 10 minutes until Dorothy’s rage was unexpectedly (and dare I say: quite unfairly) thrust upon me. But then again to her eyes who the hell was I? She […]

My first day-slash-breakdown


7.15 am: my alarm clock went off. Usually I might struggle to get out of bed and I might even stay for a bit longer. But not on that day. I had slept on the sofa as Izabela (my stepmother and carer who I was replacing) was still sleeping and was due to leave the […]

Meeting the flimsy little lady


Dorothy was this sweet, flimsy little woman who compliantly (in a strangely also defiant way) followed the rushed and caring Polish carer who she seemed attached to by an invisible rope. When  I arrived with my big suitcase to take the care job in Uxbridge  she greeted me indiscriminately, not knowing who I was, why […]